How to Make Friends in Your 20s in New Zealand: Why So Many Women Feel Lonely

If you’ve ever typed “how to make friends in your 20s” into Google, you are not alone.

Across New Zealand, thousands of young women are struggling to find meaningful friendships and genuine connection. On the outside, life can look full. Work, study, social media, relationships and busy schedules can make it seem like everyone is constantly surrounded by people. Yet behind closed doors, many women quietly feel isolated and disconnected.

At Dear Community, we hear this story every single week.

Women moving cities. Women navigating breakups. Women finishing university and suddenly losing their social circles. Women working remotely. Women who feel like they “should” already have their people but secretly feel alone.

The reality is this: making friends as an adult is hard.

Why Is It So Hard to Make Friends in Your 20s?

Your twenties are often portrayed as the most social years of your life, but for many women, they can actually feel incredibly lonely.

School and university naturally placed people together. Adult life doesn’t.

Once you leave those environments, friendships suddenly require intentional effort. People move away, priorities change, work becomes demanding, and social circles shift.

Many women in New Zealand are now searching for:

• women’s groups near me
• social events for women in Auckland
• friendship groups NZ
• community events for young women
• ways to meet new people in New Zealand

Because they genuinely want connection.

And honestly? That desire for community is completely normal.

The Rise of Loneliness in Young Women

Loneliness is becoming a growing issue globally, especially amongst young adults.

Despite living in a digitally connected world, many people feel more disconnected than ever before. Social media can create the illusion that everyone already has solid friendship groups and thriving social lives, making it even harder to put yourself out there.

But the truth is:

So many women are looking for friendship too.

That is exactly why communities like Dear Community exist.

What Is Dear Community?

Dear Community is a New Zealand non-profit organisation designed to bring women together through wholesome monthly events.

Founded in Auckland and now operating across multiple cities throughout New Zealand, Dear Community creates spaces where women aged 18–35 can meet, connect and build genuine friendships.

From coffee catch ups and beach walks to pottery classes, tennis events, painting workshops, book clubs and wellness evenings, the goal has always been simple:

Create safe, welcoming spaces where nobody feels left out.

Over the past few years, Dear Community has hosted hundreds of events across New Zealand and built a community of thousands of women looking for meaningful connection.

How to Meet New People in New Zealand

If you’re wanting to make new friends, here are a few things that genuinely help:

Attend Community Events

One of the easiest ways to meet people is through shared experiences. Community events naturally create conversation and connection without the pressure of traditional networking.

Whether it’s a brunch, walk club, run club or creative workshop, being in an environment with like-minded people makes friendships form more naturally.

Say Yes Before You Feel Ready

A lot of women wait until they feel “confident enough” to attend an event alone.

But confidence usually comes after taking the first step, not before.

Many women attend their first Dear Community event feeling nervous, and leave realising everyone else felt the same way too.

Put Yourself in Repeated Environments

Friendships are built through consistency.

Attending regular events, joining clubs or becoming part of a community gives relationships time to naturally grow over weeks and months.

Remember That Other People Are Looking for Friendship Too

This is probably the biggest one.

You are not the only person wanting connection.

Every week, women across Auckland, Wellington, Christchurch, Hamilton and beyond are searching for ways to meet new people and build genuine friendships.

Women’s Events in Auckland and Across New Zealand

Dear Community currently hosts events across numerous cities throughout New Zealand including Auckland, Wellington, Christchurch, Hamilton, Tauranga and more.

Events range from:

• coffee meet ups
• beach walks
• tennis clubs
• painting classes
• wellness events
• book clubs
• brunches
• social nights
• workshops
• community retreats

The aim is not perfection. It is belonging.

You Don’t Need to Have It All Together

One of the biggest misconceptions about attending community events is feeling like you need to already be outgoing, social or confident.

You don’t.

You simply need to show up.

At Dear Community, women come from all walks of life. Some arrive with close friends. Others come completely alone. Some are naturally extroverted. Others are quietly pushing themselves outside their comfort zones for the first time in years.

There is space for all of it.

Looking for Community in New Zealand?

If you’ve been searching for:

• how to make friends in Auckland
• women’s social clubs NZ
• friendship groups for women
• girls groups near me
• things to do in your 20s
• community events NZ
• women’s wellness events Auckland
• social groups for young women

then maybe this is your sign to finally put yourself out there.

Because life genuinely is better together.

Browse upcoming events at Dear Community Events.